Week 4, Day 5

How do moms do this?!  Feeding a child at an 8-12 month eating level is exhausting!!!  My day revolves around feeding!  My clothes are covered in pureed foods!  I don’t mean to sound like I’m complaining, but it’s a step of parenting that I did not ever experience.  With a child on a feeding tube, naps and everyday trips away from home are not a huge deal.  I could tube Gavin in the car seat anywhere or hook him up to the pump while he was sleeping.  There was no stress involved because I knew how much volume he needed in a day, and I just made sure that I accomplished that daily goal.  So much effort is associated with actually feeding a child!!  I am more than happy and eager to put forth that effort, but to be honest, there is still a part of me that is terrified of my son when we sit down for the meal.  I know my confidence in feeding him has increased dramatically through the past year of therapy as he has improved, but I am still nervous the spoon will go in too far and I will gag him, or I will put too much food on the spoon, or that sweet Gavin will turn into Monster Gavin.  Thankfully, we have survived another day and I have not had to resort to the tube!!!  I think he has had enough food for the day, but I don’t really know.  Learning to gauge real food is so new to me.  We will fumble through it like every other first time mom does, and I’m sure it will all end up okay.  These are good problems to have when he is eatingJ.

We didn’t make it to the zoo today, but we found an amazing playground instead!  My cautious little Gavin bolted for the biggest play structure I have ever seen and climbed to the top before I could hardly blink!  I followed him up there because there was only a huge tunnel slide down, and those usually terrify him.  We went down it together and he loved it!!!  It was nice to hear him laugh and have a little fun.  We also stopped for some frozen yogurt!  Gavin ate some of his, which is progress.  I know it is so strange for people to see a little kid show little interest in eating ice cream.  It almost made us feel “normal” when Gavin took about 10 licks of the yogurt!!

The majority of our day was still centered around feeding.  We found a Whole Foods, and I bought some prepared chicken and vegetables and a few low sodium soups.  I pureed them together for a few meals for Gavin since we are running a little low on the food I brought.  I also bought a little whole milk to try, and Gavin did really well with it.  It was funny that he recognized it from having some at daycare!!  He was very excited at least the first few sips to be drinking this familiar drink instead of PediaSure.  I was also happy that he accepted the new food very willingly from me.  There were our usual refusals with a few burps, but he did well.

Dr. Clawson called to check on us and let us know they are unsure when the clinic will reopen.  She was with the head of St. Mary’s Hospital when she called and gave me that lady’s cell number to call in case Gavin were to get sick.  She would be able to get us immediately into an ER here in Indianapolis so that is comforting!!  We are doing great though and show no signs of getting the bug.  I was told there is a 48 hour incubation period for this bug, so we should be in the clear as of tomorrow around noon!!

Eric’s flight should be landing around midnight, and we are SO excited to all be together again!!  I am anxiously waiting up to see himJ.  Gavin is such a daddy’s boy, it’s hard to separate the two of them for so long.  Hopefully we will be able to work a few sites in around feeding this weekend!